Oh Martha,
say it ain't so! “When I was up there at the plate, my purpose was to get on base anyway I could, whether by hitting or by getting hit.” – Shoeless Joe Jackson By Cynthia Edwards - June 18, 2002  peculation that Martha Stewart might have engaged in insider trading (when she sold her ImClone shares one day before their value was destined to drop) has my head spinning. Say it ain’t so, Martha!
Not Martha, the latter-day alchemist who turned the drudgery that the rest of liberated American women were shunning into pure gold! Not the household guru who finds inner peace late at night by ironing in her basement, and who has convinced millions of otherwise sane women to invest their spare time in cultivating rutabaga, sewing buckwheat pillows, and collecting immense quantities of pressed glass! She who shears her own sheep and sells her decorating sense by the yard at K-Mart can’t – just can’t – be involved in insider trading. She’s the barefoot girl with chic, the housekeeper who makes treasure from tag sale cast-offs. If it turns out to be true that she made money the old-fashioned way – by hobnobbing with the rich and sleazy – I will get my Dacron pillows out of storage, and wet them with my tears. Move over Martha Stewart, and welcome back Betty Crocker.
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